Nothing I can say can amount to the power this video conveys. Just watch!
08 Feb 2014 Leave a comment
Nothing I can say can amount to the power this video conveys. Just watch!
26 Jan 2014 Leave a comment
Upon taking a part time job last semester and a few freelance things here and there, I decided that I wanted to spend my money on travelling. What better way to do that than show a group of at least 25 people around one of the oldest cities in the country.
After an alright first week of school, I decided to join a group of exchange and local students on a day trip to Fes. Seeing as I haven’t been in the old Medina in a very long time, I was as much of a tourist as people who were there for the first time but that did not bother me at all. I enjoyed the I’m kinda a tourist thingie and brought out my camera at every possible occasion.
I am trying to think of one highlight of today and so many things just keep flashing in my head. From craming 20 people into an already packed bus to getting invited into a shop that apparently sells flying carpets (I swear I am not making this up, their tagline was “come in, we sell flying carpets”) not even forgetting an afternoon spent walking around the whole of Fes looking for old doors and gates to take pictures of. Today was full of a bunch of moments that made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt and I loved every single bit of it. Even the part where the Grand Taxi drivers at the taxi station started fighting (fists and all) about the fare they should make us pay. But hey! At least we made it back to campus in one piece!
09 Jan 2014 Leave a comment
I am sure you have often come across quotes by some famous, or not so famous people, talking about happiness. I bet most of them say things like you are the master of your own happiness or that your happiness is only real when it is shared with others or things of the sort. I am one of the people who upon reading one of those sentences wrinkles her nose, laughs sarcastically and moves on to the next thing. The main reason for that is because I am cynical and pessimistic in almost all possible situations. I expect the worst from people and events in order to avoid being disappointed. I also try not to get people to have a certain image of me so as not to disappoint them! However, this year I decided I should maybe, just maybe, try to be a bit more optimistic and have a more positive outlook on life.
I was browsing through my Tumblr dash one evening when I found a rather interesting concept. It was some sort of positivity jar. Basically, all you had to do is write down one good thing that happens to you each day on a piece of paper and put it in a jar throughout a whole year. Eventually, you would read all those pieces of paper and reminisce on the good times you had over the past 365 days. Considering that I have a vivid memory and in a year I would most likely remember what I was doing tonight, I figured I could adopt the concept for my own purpose.
I have started this on January 1st, and so far I have not skipped one day. Trust me, the fact that I have found at least one good thing to be happy about (yes, on certain days I was hesitating between different events during one day to write on that tiny piece of paper) is much of an achievement. Now, I am not going to say that I completely agree with the statements I spoke of above or that I will be putting them as my cover picture anytime soon. That is probably never going to happen. However, I will tell you that happiness can be anything. It might be hanging out with your best friend doing nothing but talking about random nonsense and enjoying each other’s company. It can also be a good morning text or even finding out that you are not as sick as you thought you were. Happiness can be anything from a word, a piece of cake or chocolate, to a sunset, or even and event. Happiness is what you make it to be. In Albus Dumbledore’s words: “Happiness can be found even in the darkest times, if one only remembers to turn on the light”
01 Jan 2014 Leave a comment
2013 was the first year I actually made resolutions for. They might have been rather mundane or shallow but I did stick to them to a certain degree:
But these are not the things that made 2013 special. This past year was one for self discovery and character development. I took a writing class and enjoyed every bit of it. For the first time, I channelled my emotions into something productive. I wrote of real and imagined things. I wrote of losing people I still got and getting back people I had already lost. It was the year I stopped with the “Could Have Beens”. It was the year I stood up for myself in more ways than one. It was the year I loved and lost. It was the year I learned to take out the people I like to call weeds out of my life. It was the year during which I did not only face my deepest fear, but also took a couple of steps to conquer it. I may not be there yet but I’m working on it.
These are the main things I could think of that happened this year. Most of all though, I tried to spend a bit more time with the people who matter to me most. I would like to say sorry in case any of you did not feel that and I will try even harder this coming year.
On this first day of 2014, I am not going to say the cliché “new year, new me” random stuff, that would be a waste of everything I have accomplished in the past 20 years of my existence. As a person, I see myself as some sort of onion made out of numerous layers and this upcoming year will be yet another 12 months bringing more tears and laughter, high highs and low lows. Whatever you got 2014, bring it on. I will see you on the flip side!
Photo Credits: Ghassan Mhaifid
22 Dec 2013 Leave a comment
There is warmth spreading. Slowly. Life coming back to you. Your emptiness turns into something else. You cannot really tell what it is, but it is changing, slowly, into something beautiful. It feels good. It feels so good that you forget where you are. Not completely though, just for a split second, long enough for you not to freak out. Those familiar faces surrounding you, some you have known for years, others for merely a few weeks, but it made no difference. You are there, all of you, engulfed by the aura of the last night. You don’t necessarily speak of it. You don’t necessarily judge whether it is good or bad. But everyone knows it is the last night. Of what? You may ask. None of you actually know. The lot of you are just there, in the midst of the moment, and you are caught up in your own self, as always.
“Go beyond your existence” someone once told you. It never made absolute sense. Yet, in that moment, you could tell you were, in fact, caught within your own existence. How to transcend? Perhaps Thoreau or Emerson would have an answer, but you were not really looking for one.
You found something else to get caught up on. You could feel a ghost of a smile being etched on your face. A tingling feeling. Peculiar eyes. A moment of instant infatuation. It all came crashing in at once and the ghost left instantly, going back to its original concrete state. Your smile was no longer a ghost, it was alive. It made your eyes sparkle and your cheek ache but you did not stop.
A tug on your arm. Gazes meeting halfway. Two bodies as one, intertwined in one honest hug. Goosebumps despite layers of clothing. Exaltation. And then, the cold. Except this time, it was not from within you. It was the real cold, one from the outside caused by the noblest form of precipitations. The memory of that one moment was hovering over you. It would keep doing so until the cold leaves you and you are all mush inside. However long that takes.
You are unsure, as always. Hesitant. Tentative. Short-lived craze? Forever lasting reluctance? The walls, they’re still there. Fencing you in. Freeing you out. Though they seemed to be getting thinner, they had yet to crumble and fall so you could rise and shine. At least, that’s what they say. They, the abominable they.
Despite the reluctance, hesitation and built up fear you carry around with you. You decide not to think of it. For one day, one day only, you are one foolishly crazed person on a train with a dumb smile on your face looking out the window at one breathe taking sunset. You are content.
Photo Credits: Nada Allouch
20 Dec 2013 Leave a comment
You close your eyes and try to breathe, let it go, let it all go. But the currents, they’re there. They’re always there. The waves crashing into you? Still there. And you feel redundant, your life pointless steering towards ridiculous destinations. Nothing screams help more than your silence, your broken smile. Yet, you refuse to admit it. “I am fine” you say. “I am fine” you lie. Stone cold. Emotionless. Emotionfull.
There is light. You know there is. Every day you have a few moments, hours if lucky, when everything is fine. It always happens when you have your tool, your companion, in your hands. It happens when you are painting with light. Then, as soon as you stop seeing, darkness and hurt wash over you again. Still, you don’t necessarily fight. “I am fine” you say. “I am fine” you lie.
Snap. Crack. Bang. It all clicks. It all breaks. And you fall down. You don’t know who you are fighting. The currents. The waves. The mundane redundancy of your pathetic life. The push and pull you have with the people surrounding you. It’s all part of you. Snap. Crack. Bang.
The enemy is you.
You think of it while sipping a cup of your favourite tea. You think of it in the thick of the night when your only company is your fever-induced nightmares. You realise it when your anxiety is at its peak. You accept it when you are in the arms of your dearest people.
You are your own enemy and there isn’t much you can do.
Photo credits: Ghassan Mhaifid
08 Nov 2013 Leave a comment
Director: Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris
Producers by: Albert Berger
Written by: Zoe Kazan
Starring: Zoe Kazan
I heard of this movie about a year ago, yet, it wasn’t until last weekend that I finally got around to watching it.
Let me start off by saying that if you have watched and liked 500 Days of Summer I am fairly sure you will like this one too. The story revolves around Calvin, a young writer who is going throug a somewhat nervous breakdown while he is struggling with his first breakthrough novel. Right now, I am divided between telling you the whole storyline or letting you figure it out by yourselves. I think I am settling for the second option.
What I am going to tell you though is that Paul Dano and Zoe Kazan showed an exemplary chemistry on screen. That of course is no suprise since they actually are a couple off-screen. There is also Antonio Banderas whom I did not recognize at first because of how quierky he was and Annette Bening who is forever and always perfect in any role she plays, in my humble opinion.
I think this perfectly displays how easy it is to idolize a partner in a relationship and how, no matter what, you always find yourself trying to change that person into something they are not. I am afraid that if I say more, I will disclose too much so I am just going to invite you to watch the movie and let me know what you think of it!
28 Oct 2013 Leave a comment
You are alive. You spent your life navigating through alleyways of moments, sounds, light, touches. Driven by constellations of feelings towards some uncertain event. You know you are gonna end up somewhere, you just don’t know where yet. But you’re letting it happen. No one, nothing, is stopping you.
Until the day you decide to question it all. Why? When? How? Where? Who? With whom? And you stall everything. Nothing feels right. You stop navigating, you start searching. You want that uncertain event to become certain, yet deep down you know that will not happen. You end up fighting all sorts of currents, fighting to the point it gets unbearable but you carry on doing so no matter what. Your limbs start falling apart, One by one. They’re then followed by the rest of your body: shoulders, arms, legs, hips, back, head, eyes. Everything hurts. Constantly. It hurts to the point you wish you were dead but nothing makes you feel more alive than that chronic nagging pain that would not leave you alone.
Even then. Even when you’re falling apart and you feel like you have no reason to keep it together. You could eventually just let everything go and maybe you’ll find new alleyways to navigate. The thought of losing control scares you, so you carry on fighting. Not because you want to fight but because you don’t want to lose. You’ve always been a sore loser and now that you are the only one in the competition you realize just how ridiculously stubbord and self-destructive that was.
You carry on not losing for a while. You carry on living with pain. You carry on telling yourself that it’s because you stopped drinking soda or because people suck. Until the day you realize none of it is true. And you breakdown. It all comes crashing in waves, engulfing you to the point you cannot breathe. You let it out. All of it, tears and muffled screams. And then…nothing. No relief, no nothing. You’re back to square 1 and everything hurts just as much as it did before. Maybe giving in was not the solution after all.
"Remember that wherever your heart is, there you will find your treasure," Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
My adventures studying abroad and beyond
“The world is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page.” – Saint Augustine
Le diable en moi danse avec ses démons, et la sarabande est loin d'être terminée.
The Art and Craft of Blogging
ذهبت الأخلاق و ماتت القيم , هرولت من حولي الملائكة و لفتني الشياطين
the bifeminist, interfaith ramblings of an apostate writer
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Le Blog de Samia Haimoura.
Writing my way through life ...